Invisible Guns
by CuntPuntRunt
Summary: Bakura and Marik make a bet. PARTY IN A BOX.  Drunkness.


**INVISIBLE GUNS**

**Another crackfic by: Kanamakia Tsunderene**

**EMAIL ME: **

**DISCLAIMER: **I was inspired by a motivational poster I found on Google, its purty funny, YGOTAS is a given. OH! And a video on YouTube : LOL Bakura 2. You should watch it, it's really quite entertaining. Obligatory Hunter X Hunter reference! As of May 29th it'll have been two years since I fell in love with Kurapika and Leorio! WHOOTS!

**WORD OF WORDS!: ** Umm. I'll leave you all to imagine what Bakura did to owe Marik. 

_Let the GAYmes begin! – I have NOTHING against gay people. I think they're fun is all. ENJOY!_

_-XX-XX-_

Bakura: GUESS WHO?

*_woody the wood pecker laugh*_

Marik: *_laughs hysterically*_

Bakura: Can I be done now?

Marik: *_Suddenly serious* _NO! I want you to say _**IT.**_

Bakura: Ugh. Not _**IT.**_

Marik: Yes _**IT. **_Do you want to stop being in debt to me?

Bakura: Ugh…Fine.

Marik: *_Childish giggle*_ he's gonna do it!

Bakura: *_glares menacingly/with no expression* _Ugh…. L'Oreal, because I'm worth it.

Marik: You have to swish your hair too!

Bakura: Hell no.

Marik: YES! OR I'LL DESTROY YOUR HOST!

Ryou: *_scared whimper* _P-please don't… What do you owe him for anyways?

Bakura: *_blush*_ uh… no reason.

Ryou: *_looks into Bakura's memory* _OH! How could you? That's terrible. Don't use my body for things like that!

Bakura: It's not unnatural…All I did was-

Marik: WELL?

Bakura: *_over exaggerated hair flip in slow-mo* _L'Oreal, because I'm worth it!

Marik: *_clapping hands vigorously as he moves to reveal the hidden camera* _YAY! I caught that on tape!

Bakura: W-What?

Marik: YES! Now all of your fangirls will know that YOU are the gay one!

Bakura: Marik… YOU are the gay one.

Marik: No, my YAMI is the gay one.

Bakura: Marik, He's YOU!

Marik: HE is the GAY one.

Bakura: … OY… how many times must we go over this, damnit. Marik, HE'S YOU!

Marik: …

Bakura: _I wonder…did it work…?_

Marik: HE is the gay one!

Bakura: *_Puts two fingers to his temple like a gun*_

Marik: Bakura, what are you doing?

Bakura: Shooting myself.

Marik: But that won't work! You don't even have a gun!

Bakura: Yes I do. My hand is a gun.

Marik: No it's not!

Bakura: Do you want to make a bet?

Marik: Sure! If your hand is a gun, I'll tell the world that I'm gay and then I'll kiss a guy.

Bakura: And if my hand isn't a gun, I'll change my name to fluffy, say "L'Oreal, because I'm worth it" and flip my hair every ten minutes, and then I'll tell the world that you and I had a three way with Seto Kaiba.

Seto Kaiba: When did this happen?

Bakura: Go away Seto…. So, Marik, do we have a deal?

Marik: Well… I'm not so sure now! You'd never do those things!

Bakura: I would if my hand isn't a gun….

Marik: O-Ok… But how are we going to test it?

Bakura: How about we kil—

Marik: And don't say kill Yugi Moto, or a soft kitten, or some other cute thing!

Bakura: That's not gay at all, Marik.

Marik: YOU ARE THE GAY ONE!

Bakura: SHUT UP MARIK…. Now, Let's test it by shooting a bird.

Marik: NOT !

Bakura: Who the bloody hell is Mr. Tweetums?

Marik: n-no one!

Bakura: He's your pet bird …

Marik: NO!

Bakura: You have a pet bird….Named Mr. Tweetums. Say yes if you mean no.

Marik: No! W-wait! Yes!

Bakura: So, you DO have a pet bird named Mr. Tweetums…

Marik: Shut up. Let's just shoot an empty can or something…

Bakura: Ok, get the empty can.

Marik: I don't drink anything in a can, it's bad for my figure!

Bakura: *_snickers_*

Marik: I have to be able to wear a sexy belly shirt for those who have a bellybutton fetish!

Bakura: Alright then, let's shoot Mr. Tweetums!

Marik: NO! I'll go buy some beer.

Bakura: What makes you think I want beer?

Marik: I'm just used to buying beer for my dad…who still calls me Billy…

Bakura: *_sighs in mock disappointment_* Very well then. I'm not a lightweight, so I' can handle it.

Ryou: I CAN'T DRINK BEER! I'LL GET DRUNK!

Bakura: Ah, that sucks, doesn't it.

Ryou: Don't do it! I- I'll refuse to wear the ring for a long time! Yes! That will be your punishment!

Bakura: Not worried. You'll put it on after a day or so. You always do.

Ryou: I mean it this time!

Bakura: Sure you do, Hikari….Sure you do.

Marik: *_returns with a twenty four pack of beer* _

Bakura: That was quick.

Marik: yes, 'cause in some fanmade productions such as this one, we can totally break the space-time continuum.

Bakura: I see….now hand me a beer so I can drink it and shoot it.

Marik: If I can open the damned box! OH! I broke a nail! Owww! Oh no!

Bakura: You…broke a nail…?

Marik: Yes! I just had them done yester—

Bakura: *_smiles mockingly_*

Marik: OH! Shut your face, Bakura!

Bakura: That's not physically possible…

Marik: You know what I mean!

*_Hill Billy music* _ ** - TWO HOURS LATER—**

_**SCENE: **__Marik is sitting upside down on a couch with his legs hooked over the back cushions, Bakura is sitting cross legged in a recliner a beer in his hand. He's not drunk at all, but still really damn sexy. Ah, yes. I would pork that all night long if he would sit still long enough. WHOOPS. Sorry I rambled there._

Bakura: Hey. Marik!

Marik: *_REALLY DRUNK_* Wow, Ba-Bakura… I had no idea….you looked…So-so-so….

Bakura: Yes?

Marik: …sexy….in a maids….uniform…

Bakura: I'M NOT WEARING A MAIDS UNIFORM!

Marik: Yes….you keep Tell-tellin' yourself that….

Bakura: Hmmm…. Marik. Are you drunk?

Marik: *_shaking head_*No. No. Nopesiedaisies.

Bakura: Marik, do you find me attractive?

Marik: what?

Bakura: Do you like boys, Marik?

Marik: Yes. They're fun to play with.

Bakura: Are you a pedophile...?

Marik: Yes. They're fun to play with.

Bakura: Do you like Barbie dolls?

Marik: Yes. They're fun to play with…

Bakura: _this is fun *Presses record on camera*… _What do you think when I say the word "Penises"?

Marik: Yes. They're fun to play with…

Bakura: "Little boys" ?

Marik: Yes. They're fun to play with…

Bakura: "Barbie Dolls"?

Ryou: HEY! When I was young I played Barbie dolls with my sister!

Bakura: *_Laughs* Quiet Hikari, let me have my fun!_

Marik: Yes. They're fun to play with.

Bakura: Cute, innocent little boys like Gon Freecss and Yugi Moto?

Marik: That's a party….i-in a box…

Bakura: _This is getting boring….*stops the camera* _Ok, Marik. Go to sleep.

Marik: Ok. Ok. Sleepy time for the teddy bears…. *_falls asleep*_

Bakura: …

||||||||||||||||||||||| **Four Hours Later**|||||||||||||||||||||||||

Marik: Hey! Hey Bakura! Wake up!

Bakura: _*Groggily* _ gah….what is it Marik?

Marik: I have a headache! Was I drunk?

Bakura: Yes…. Just a little.

Marik: How many beers did I drink?

Bakura: nine of them. I drank the rest. I wasn't bothered.

Marik: But why aren't you hungover, Bakura?

Bakura: Because I can handle my liquor. Bitch.

Marik: I'm not a bitch!

Bakura: You are the gay bitch. You can't even drink ten beers without getting wasted.

Marik: OH! YES! Our bet! Your hand is NOT a gun!

Bakura: Yes it is. And I'll prove it to you right now.

Marik: Ok! Shoot the empty can!

Bakura: Put it on top of your head, then I'll shoot it.

Marik: NO! what if you miss?

Bakura: That's a chance I'm willing to take, Marik.

Marik: I'm NOT! Shoot it off of the railing!

Bakura: What, a train? Full of cutsey little birds? Mr. Tweetums beig one of them?

Marik: NO! Not Mr. Tweetums!

Bakura: Alright, then. Put it on the rail, Marik.

Marik: _*puts can on railing*_

Bakura: Ready?

Marik: Yes!

Bakura: BANG! *_wind knocks over can*_

Marik: HOLY HELL! YOUR HAND REALLY IS A GUN!

Bakura: _*blows on fingertips* I _ told you.

Marik: Do I really have to tell the world I'm gay now?

Bakura: Yes, Marik. Get the camera. I'll goo call Flamer Seto.

Marik: Not Flamer Seto!

Bakura : Yes, Marik. Flamer Seto.

Marik: NOOOOOOOO…

_-XX-XX-_

YAY! Tis finished!

Whoopity cay yay!

REVIEW PLEEZ!


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